Thursday, February 26, 2004

Why Jade's February 16 Post Got an Inundation of Comments, Or: Is Sex Right?, Or: How Not to Be a Tight Ass



Because those who say it's wrong

Are desperate virgins, really, who are compensating

By rationalizing God into their lonely nights.

In the end, those who cry "Wolf!"

Are wolves themselves, although they may think themselves

Sheep—pure as the wool on their backs

And heavenly as the Myths they possess:

White lambs sacred as snow, sacrificial animals

Before God's judging eyes. The key words here

Are "sacrificial" and "judging": blood and

Hell fire—the paradigms of the righteous

Among us who are quite enamored with Sin they

Reflect the darkness within and see it cast

On our mirrors, and call themselves redeemed.

Consider the Spanish Inquisition, St. Bartholomew's Day

Massacre, the Magdalene houses in Ireland --

Religious retributions for the carnal and the heretic,

And thus we know: that the strangest

Of Evil really mistakes itself for What Is Good.

Like Hitler, or Dubya. The villain never knows he is a villain.

Last night, we gossiped about Mrs. S., that teacher

In the University who used to embody Morality itself

So much she looked like a pinched virgin. And how

Last summer she almost died

On the operating table, after her husband's germ

Fled her closed vagina and traveled to her brain...

The story went that when she closed her eyes

To go towards the light, she saw the

Shadows of demons instead. And frantic, woke up,

Breathless, like

Lazarus. Today she still believes her God and in His

Goodness, but gives her students condoms: "If you

Can't say no, my dear, at least be safe," she now says.

She left her husband, too, and has grown

Plump these days, like Mary's

Little Lamb, or Bah Bah Black Sheep.

A real sheep who changed its wool! Then again,

The sheep I know out there in Tatang's

Field are never really that white, their wool

A trap of lice and dirt, and comes off gray

At most, nothing like the biblical animals

We take as objects of a faith. Come to think of

It, when the lion laid down with the lamb,

Was it to cuddle? Interspecies romance?

Sex? How do we know Sex is All Right?

So I asked God last night, "God, I'm your lamb, right?

Should I have sex? Is sex right?" And God said,

"Yo, I invented orgasm."


[0] This is Where You Bite the Sandwich

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