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This is the blog of Ian Rosales Casocot. Filipino writer. Sometime academic. Former backpacker. Twink bait. Hamster lover.

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Monday, December 20, 2004

entry arrow1:26 PM | Shameless

The Irish daughter had not been to the house for over five years.

Upon her return, her father cussed her: "Where have you been all this time, you ingrate! Why didn't you write us, not even a line to let us know how you were doing? Why didn't you call? You little tramp! Don't you know what you put your Mum through?!"

The girl, crying, replied, "Sniff, sniff ... Dad ... I became a prostitute...."

"WHAT!? Out of here, you shameless harlot! Sinner! You're a disgrace to this family. I don't ever want to see you again!"

"OK, Dad -- as you wish. I just came back to give Mom this luxury fur coat, title deeds to a ten-bedroom mansion, plus a savings account certificate for 35 million. For my little brother, this gold Rolex, and for you Daddy the spanking new Mercedes limited edition convertible that's parked outside plus a lifetime membership to the Country Club..." She takes a breath. "And an invitation for you all to spend New Years' Eve on board my new yacht in the Riviera, and...."

"Now what was it you said you had become?"

Girl, crying again, "Sniff, sniff ... A prostitute, Dad! ... Sniff, sniff."

"Oh! Be Jesus! You scared me half to death, girl! I thought you said a 'Protestant.' Come here and give your old man a hug!"

[an emailed forward from Margie]

[0] This is Where You Bite the Sandwich