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This is the blog of Ian Rosales Casocot. Filipino writer. Sometime academic. Former backpacker. Twink bait. Hamster lover.

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Sunday, September 21, 2008

entry arrow10:48 PM | Something's Gotta Give

There are specific ages in your life that become a set of defining moments that inevitably compose who you are as a human being. In my own story, turning 16 was one. There was 19, and 21, and then 25 -- that glorious year, and then 28, and then 31. I have a strange feeling 33 will be one of those years. I can already feel the changes in my bones. I've been out a lot lately, because of work, because of things I must do for the Cultural Affairs Committee, because of friends. I haven't been out this much in recent years, and my own new epiphany is not out of some deliberate human design: the universe is trying to tell me something, and I find my feet scurrying to the direction I must go as divined by the stars. Tonight, over good dinner and companionship from a friend newly-arrived from Madrid (somebody I haven't seen for more than seven years), the rain for the Sunday evening pushed me to create a list of 12 things I must do for the coming days. I wasn't trying to become romantic, and the rain certainly was not instrumental for me being suddenly introspective. The list just arrived like some inspired burst of synapses in my brain -- and I knew these were things I needed to do. It will be hard to follow with such drive and intensity, this list. But at 33, one realizes there are things in life you must learn to have faith with, and ultimately, if one must grow, something's gotta give.

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