I'm sorry for waking up mushy today, I did not mean to. But it's a beautiful Sunday, and there is a certain urgency to the morning: in a few days I shall be leaving for India, and that means I will not be seeing you for a while. "For a while" for both of us can actually mean eternity, and if there is one sadness that is twin to my excitement of having to travel again, it is that I cannot be with you like I do almost every day for the past four years.
Today, we celebrate our nth monthsary, and it may seem strange for many people that we still celebrate something as blatantly diabetic for its mushy sweetness. Why celebrate monthsaries? Do they really mean anything? they ask. But I have always considered it a kind of miracle that we are still together after all these years, and by God, are still very much in love with each other, even when I get too busy sometimes, and there are many differences between us that can spell doom for ordinary people. Not us. We have transcended everything to be with each other, and that is a miracle I celebrate because what we have is what gives my life meaning.
Today, while I putter about the apartment trying to flit from one kind of work to another, I listen to this song from Gary Valenciano, and I can't help but tear up more than I use to, because this song -- which you don't really like, hehehe -- means so much to me because it contains the whole truth about what I really feel about you.
And so here it is...
... and we can sing along, if we want to.
I remember so well The day that you came into my life You asked for my name You had the most beautiful smile
My life started to change I'd wake up each day feeling alright With you right by my side Makes me feel things will work out just fine
How did you know I needed someone like you in my life That there's an empty space in my heart You came at the right time in my life
I'll never forget How you brought the sun to shine in my life And took all the worries and fears that I had I guess what I'm really trying to say It's not everyday that someone like you comes my way No words can express how much I love you
I love this song -- composed by Cecile Azarcon Inocentes -- because unlike most love songs that cater more to an acknowledgment of the carnal and the quickening nether regions or even the politics of emotional blackmail, this song is about being grateful. Where else do we get a song that is about gratefulness, about thanking one's significant other about "filling up that empty space in our hearts"? I like its primal honesty, about how it shows all of us that true love is really about completion. It's not about sex, it's not about having the proper trophy to hang around with, it's not about answering our baser instincts: it's about the magic that glimmers in the truest coming together.
And we have that, bubu. And so, from the deepest part of my heart, I would like to say thank you for everything. Happy monthsary.