Friday, July 03, 2026
We just had our closing ceremony for Pamati: Let the River Rest tonight, and tomorrow, the Puerto Princesa Underground River reopens and this will be my first time to experience this natural wonder. This has been a satisfying work trip for UNACOM. Every time I get asked to speak, my ADHD brain always wallows in some form of impostor’s syndrome. Will my talk make sense? Will I impart usable knowledge? Do I have the right to talk about the things I am asked to talk about? Tonight, a huge part of that doubting got erased by the responses some of the participants gave. [One even quoted me!] So, yes, I’m happy. And I’m glad I took part in this pursuit of using art and creativity to do environmental conservation. Would love to do something like this for Lake Balinsasayao. Padayon!Labels: environment, life, teaching, UNACOM, UNESCO
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6:19 PM |
The Universe Has a Sense of Humor
The truth of the matter is, I was most curious to visit Puerto Princesa, because this is the hometown of my first boyfriend, my, ehem, college sweetheart. Thirty years have since passed those days, and sixteen since I last saw him. So I finally went to Puerto Princesa proper today, and when I got off the van, guess who the first person I saw was.
Him.
It was ... an awkward reunion. But I think this officially closes a chapter in my life, hehehe. The universe has a sense of humor.
Labels: life, love, travel
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Wednesday, July 01, 2026
9:56 PM |
In Puerto Princesa
Just hazily documenting my first day in Puerto Princesa today. I flew in very early, after spending a very short night in Manila in transit to Palawan. Did not get to see much of the city proper of Puerto Princesa because I was soon whisked away by the service van provided for by UNACOM, all the way to Daluyon Beach and Mountain Resort in Sabang. I thought it would be a short ride, but to my groggy surprise, it took almost two hours to get to our destination — 75 kilometers away from the center of the city — and I thought we were in another town altogether. But nooo, I would later learn Sabang is still very much a part of the city.
I'm here for UNESCO duties, to be one of the resource speakers for Pamati: Let the River Rest, a cultural festival honoring the closure of the Puerto Princesa Underground River for three days, with film director Dante Nico Garcia as lead coordinator. [The Underground River is one of the UNESCO-designated natural heritage sites in the Philippines.]
When I arrived this morning, however, I was practically a zombie from lack of sleep and the general tiredness of travel, that I purposely missed the morning session, and staggered to my assigned room, where I immediately took to bed and knocked out for five hours. Later in the day, I attended parts of the afternoon session, and tried my best to finish my presentation due tomorrow morning, but residual sleep also took over. I finally joined the screening of a documentary titled Fragile Frontier while having dinner with the rest of the participants. The film is about the impact of Typhoon Odette on Palawan, directed by Jessie Cereno and produced by the UNESCO National Commission for the Philippines [UNACOM]. [It is narrated by Silliman author and cultural worker Jane Timbancaya-Urbanek.]
I will always find travel to be essential in my work in culture. When you are surrounded by like-minded people of other places who share your passion, and finding them doing their thing in surprising ways you never thought possible, it’s a charge that rejuvenates the often flagging spirit. I’m privileged to be able to do this, and now I’m here in Puerto Princesa. I needed this injection of inspiration after the relentless barrage of June.
Labels: art and culture, ccultural work, life, travel, UNACOM, UNESCO
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7:00 AM |
Poetry Wednesday, No. 298.
Labels: poetry
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Tuesday, June 30, 2026
They’re implementing a new online system for faculty loading. And I was like, yey. Then I find out they’re making it three times more difficult with all these roundabout way of approvals and signatures. And I was like, grrrr.
Labels: life, silliman, teaching
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Wednesday, June 24, 2026
7:00 AM |
Poetry Wednesday, No. 297.
Labels: poetry, Pride, queer
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Wednesday, June 17, 2026
7:00 AM |
Poetry Wednesday, No. 296.
Labels: poetry, Pride, queer
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Monday, June 15, 2026
6:47 PM |
Hinay-Hinay Lang...
Finally letting my mindscape, and my life, return back to normal after the beautiful tumult of the past two weeks: a workshop and a home improvement project following each other was an upheaval I had no idea would take so much out of me, I actually ended up sick for a day or two, mostly from the stress and the unbearable heat. But I’m happy with the results, and I’m about to pick up where I left off…
Truth to tell, when I was in the middle of the grind, of the mess of home improvement last week — for example, bringing out all my books slowly, by small batches, to a corner of the anteroom so that the carpenters and painters could do work — I had to summon all the patience I could muster, despite being so tired and stressed out, by repeating a simple mantra: "Hinay-hinay lang." [To translate: Just surrender to the slowness.]
It helped.
It kept me sane.
And that is what I'm also telling myself right now as I return back to normal: hinay-hinay lang.Labels: life
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Sunday, June 14, 2026
11:00 PM |
Apartment Reveal!
Finally done! After nine days of repainting, renovating, reshelving, and replacing things where they should be, I’m finally done with my small home improvement project. [My scheme of red and black together feels like me, now.] Spent two days of those nine flat on my back with fever, however. But today, I finally got my new bed, and the last touch I needed was flowers to brighten up my small apartment. But everything’s done, and tonight I hosted a small dinner for Renz and Tita Melisa to celebrate. This 50th birthyear has really been something.
Labels: life
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Friday, June 12, 2026
9:00 PM |
Shelves Reveal
Everything’s in place. Red walls, black shelves. It took four days of painting and carpentry and three days of arranging everything. This is the Filipiniana part of my library, and for the first time all the books are in their rightful places, arranged in alphabetical order by author. My new bed arrives on Sunday, but for now I’m done. But then suddenly I’m also getting feverish now. Oh, man.
Labels: life
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Wednesday, June 10, 2026
7:00 AM |
Poetry Wednesday, No. 295.
Labels: poetry, Pride, queer
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Friday, June 05, 2026
10:21 AM |
Lutang, Post-Lutang
I am resolutely not a morning person, but starting yesterday, my body finally adjusted to the early schedules of the past few days because of the workshop. I have been so lutang since Sunday, and the worst of it was Tuesday when I excused myself in the afternoon because I was crashing out hard. But now my brain has begrudgingly started to function. I finally have some energy to also take care of other things, thank God.
Labels: life
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Wednesday, June 03, 2026
7:00 AM |
Poetry Wednesday, No. 294.
Labels: poetry, Pride, queer
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Thursday, May 28, 2026
1:39 AM |
Life with Adult ADHD
The funny and often frustrating thing about having adult ADHD — aside from such fun things as executive dysfunction, time blindness, revenge bedtime procrastination, and rejection sensitive dysphoria — is the utter truthfulness of the phrase, “out of sight, out of mind.” Which explains all the open tabs on my browsers, and my meticulously composed calendar and notebook filled with to-do lists, which works better for me than Post-Its.
Still, the unfortunate happens, which I’ve learned to just laugh over. I don’t see you for six months? I’ll forget your name. Your Messenger missive got buried under 20 other messages? Best forgotten. The leftovers in the refrigerator? Does not exist until thrown out a month later, because moldy. The cup of hot cocoa the waiter in the cafe gave to me tonight but was blocked out of sight by my laptop? Invisible until Renz came over and gently nudged it to my line of vision. “Oh, my cocoa!” I responded, and happily finished it.Labels: adhd, life, mental health
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Wednesday, May 27, 2026
7:00 AM |
Poetry Wednesday, No. 293.
Labels: poetry
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Saturday, May 23, 2026
What a day. Three different social interactions, all of them somehow satisfying. Started with good friends around a pool in a village west of Dumaguete, talking about literary stuff. Proceeded to an exhibit opening, surrounded by other good friends of the artsy variety. Ended with a subdued nightcap with glittering people from the national social register, including the editor of a fashion magazine, talking about interior design over white wine. All while I’m dressed in my Dumaguete-style purontong shorts and Lady Gaga shirt.Labels: life
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Wednesday, May 20, 2026
7:00 AM |
Poetry Wednesday, No. 292.
Labels: poetry
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Wednesday, May 13, 2026
I knew eventually that my body would demand rest after the roller coaster of the first third of this year. Last night, I thought I was succumbing to the flu because my bones were aching. The unbearable heat was partly to blame. Took Biogesic, slept early, and when I woke up, I was fine. Thank God for small mercies. But now, here’s catching up on all manners of backlog!
But to be honest, this heat has been something else. For the first time in my life, I actually Googled this query: “How much does an airconditioning unit cost in the Philippines?”Labels: life
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7:00 AM |
Poetry Wednesday, No. 291.
Labels: poetry
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Monday, May 11, 2026
7:18 PM |
My Brain When I'm Cleaning
Currently cleaning the apartment, which means that my ADHD brain is firing all cylinders and getting new ideas, which means that I have to stop once in a while to take notes [or else forget them] or to message someone. This is why it takes me three days to clean my apartment.Labels: cleanliness, life, mental health
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